Well hello there, I’ve been 30 years old for about a week now so what better time to post an update. I’m not sure what it was about my 20s, but it was exhausting. Lessons, experiences, memories, good or bad, I will cherish them all. Because here we are, at the start of a new chapter. So, are you ready to say goodbye to my 20s with me? Here are the final things I’ve learned.
6. Self Love is Hard
No, I’m not talking about *that* type of self-love 🙄. Before we get into it, you know I love me some definitions.
Self-love is a state of appreciation for oneself that grows from actions that support our physical, psychological, and spiritual growth. Self-love means having a high regard for your own well-being and happiness. Self-love means taking care of your own needs and not sacrificing your well-being to please others. Self-love means not settling for less than you deserve (source: bbrfoundation).
This sounds pretty straightforward, right? Well, in reality, a lot of people don’t realize their self-love journey still needs to begin. I started my journey in 2019 (after a rude awakening) and I still have a long way to go. But realizing it is the first step. When I realized how important self-love is I started to do some research and let me tell you, I was shocked. For instance, I came across a post that describes 10 signs you really love yourself. That post really hit a nerve and I realized, I needed to change a lot. Thus, I started my journey. I’m gonna start blogging about this journey, so sign up for new post notifications on the homepage if you want to be updated!
7. Mental Health is Underrated
Most people understand how important mental health is, but don’t really show it in reality. It’s me, I’m most people. I always knew taking care of my brain was important, but it’s so easy to take it for granted. You just go about your day and do most things without thinking about it. You go to a job that you may or may not hate, because it pays the bills. You stay in a relationship with a partner you may or may not love because it’s what you’re used to. You hang out with friends who may or may not add to your social battery, because they’re your “friends”. I can go on and on, but the point is that it’s important to identify and then deal with certain things. Because sooner or later, you will find that your mental state is not doing all too well. I learned this lesson the hard way by staying in a job that was mentally draining. Eventually, I made the decision to leave because what started mentally ended up physically. Mental health is not something you can just push aside. It should always be a priority. See a therapist, read a book, write in a journal, exercise, do whatever helps you get back to you.
8. You’re Dying
My boyfriend used to say this all the time and it always sounded so bleak. But I get it now. Also, it sounds 10000x better than yolo don’t you think? But in all seriousness, this life is yours to live. And I understand that sometimes the circumstances make it a lot harder to actually enjoy it. But eventually, you’ll get there. Maybe it starts with you taking a teeny tiny step out of your comfort zone and realizing it’s not as bad as you thought it would be. Fast-forward to you not even recognizing your comfort zone anymore, because you redecorated it with new courage and a can-do attitude. Trust me, you’ll love it.
I used to be very hard on myself. Don’t get me wrong, I’m still hard on myself, but I also forgive myself more. And I also believe in myself more. Being confident can be the best thing ever. And it’s a big part of self-love. Apply for that new job, because you know you can do it. Wear those skinny jeans, because your butt looks great. Try out that new lip color, because it brings out the color of your eyes. That short haircut you pinned on Pinterest? Do it. Worst case scenario, it’ll grow back. The best part is, if you don’t like it you can change it. Because again, this is your life to live. Just live it shamelessly confident. Because you’re all that.
9. It’s Okay to Relax
This is still a work in progress for me. I quit my job a few months ago and I just needed a break after that. But somehow I felt this pressure to find another job right away even though I knew I wasn’t mentally ready. I started to avoid people because all they wanted to talk about was work. I felt bad when someone asked me about my day because all I did was watch Netflix. The truth is, I feel like I need to be productive every single day in order to feel accomplished. But, taking care of myself is also an accomplishment. If I want to sleep all day because that’s what I need at that moment that’s totally okay. If I don’t want to hang out with friends because I’m having a movie marathon by myself, that’s okay too. Take a deep breath and relax, it’s okay.
10. Invest in Something
Money, the root of all evil. Okay, I’m kidding. Sort of. But really, money can be very important in some cases. Especially if you want to live carefree and independent. Don’t quit your job just yet though. Building an investment takes time, research, and more time. Understand what you’re investing in and make sure you follow the companies movements. I invested in some cryptocurrencies and I’m running my own nodes on Presearch. You can read about that here. Having a savings account is great, but let’s be honest it’s not really doing anything. But before you go and dump all of your savings into a project, again, do your research. Investing does not come without risks. Also, don’t be afraid to lose money, it’ll pay off in the end.
Well, that’s it I guess. Of course, I learned a lot more but these are the most important lessons. Can’t wait to see what my 30s have in store for me.